NoFap & Excessive Masturbation: Let’s find Balance in our Sexuality, Men!

The Cycle of Desire and Control

In ancient times, civilizations knew something we almost forgot, but we can not avoid it because we are it.

They lived in rhythm with nature, understanding its cycles, even in matters of sexual energy. They saw patterns in the moon, the sun, and mirrored these in their lives.

They knew when to hold back and when to release, much like farmers know when to plant and when to harvest.

Things grow and decline, like the changing seasons. We have times to start new things and times to let go, just like nature does. This also happens with people. In women with their period, but with men also.

This cycle, this ebb and flow, is nature's truth. It's in the way the tides move, the way the seasons change.

And everything is changing, and everything is the mirror of the other.

The scary, yet wonderful phenomenon is, that in order to understand this mirroring, you have to see it in every possible way natures reflects itself. When a female is formed, the correspondent part of her sexual organs of a penis is the clitoris.

So basically the clit is a mirroring of the penis but in female body.

The clitoris and penis come from the same embryonic tissue. They have some similarities, like being made of erectile tissue and having a similar base structure.

However, they are different in terms of their development, function, and role in the reproductive system.

Women have periods. This is also true for men, but it is more subtle because our biology is mainly influenced by the solar cycle. But that does not mean, it does not exist.

These patterns are not coincidences. They are reminders that we are part of something larger. This larger thing moves in seasons and breathes in and out. It is an endless cycle of creation and release.

This Blogpost is specifically geared towards the male human species.

Men, typically, resonate more with the solar cycle, while women align with the lunar cycle. This isn't just poetic imagery; it's a reflection of how our biological rhythms are synchronized with nature.

The solar cycle, with its consistent daily rhythm, mirrors the male experience.

The lunar cycle reflects the female experience. It has monthly phases and a complex pattern of changes.

Understanding this is vital because truth in sexual energy management is relative and momentary.

This concept challenges the rigidity of 'NoFap' and the recklessness of overindulgence. It recommends a responsive approach. This approach adapts to the natural rhythms and cycles of our bodies.

The Extremes of Sexual Energy Management

In the realm of sexual energy, people often debate between 'NoFap' and excessive indulgence. However, there is a middle path that aligns with the lunar and solar cycles, waiting to be explored.

But firstly we will explore the outer rim of extremes.

Take NoFap.

NoFap is a practice where you do not engage in masturbation as a man. You learn to abstain from seeking physical pleasure.

The reasons why people do it is to gain self control, practice will and cultivate lifeforce energy. And I myself did it too for a period of 2-3 years.

It's not solely about willpower or moral high ground. It's a journey that taught me about the accumulation of sexual energy and its potency. Some of the benefits of NoFap are:

• High Energy Levels (more power, motivation, drive)
• Mental Clarity
• More Potency (not only in your genitals, but all your actions and thoughts)

But there's a catch.

You can end up "too charged up," almost ungrounded. Just like holding your breath for too long; eventually, you need to exhale.

Then, there's the other extreme – thinking that letting go without restraint is the way. That's a path fraught with its own risks.

Also many men attach some kind of weird pride into bragging about that they masturbate 3 times a day.

It’s a comical place to be in. Especially if you use porn.

Pornography, for instance, paints a distorted picture. It fooled us. The whole porn industry is one of the biggest industries on earth. It provides quick relieve and dopamine.

Much like a drug dealer, isn’t it? It teaches us that sex is an performance act. Wires our brain that “it has to look, sound and feel a certain way”

We men get mechanical in this approach.

Sex is about connection.

And porn should honor this.

But it doesn't. Watching too much porn and masturbating can make you feel tired and disconnected from your true sense of masculinity. Newest research on how damaging porn addiction can be for the brain is actually scary.

But what is happening here? Well,

If we would look at it from an metaphysical perspective: All the life force energy gets sucked into this black hole called the porn industry

People spend hours and a lot of resources into satisfying themselves with the pleasure of masturbating.

But instead, we men have turned masturbation into a mechanical act, losing its ritual and pleasure. We have forgotten to see it as a gift that can be done with love, and have instead made it about visual appeal and mechanical functionality.

The main issue here is that a lot of life energy is focused on an industry that drains our energy like a parasite.

In our todays creator economy, we know how important attention is.

Attention is the new currency.

Now think of attention as real estate. Can you imagine how much attention real estate porn has sucked into it?

I want to go deep here, so read carefully.

We humans measure our success in our endevours by ROI

ROI means Return of Investment

Things that take time, needs sacrifice or resources to be built, require a lot of energy to be realized. And thats okay.

…thats okay because we know and hope at some point this investment will be returned.

With watching porn there is no return of investment, it is a black hole.

It mostly only has negative effects.

And having a porn addiction can damage your brain pretty heavily.

What to know about Porn Addiction

We label forces that take our energy without giving some other form of energy back in return parasitic.

Let me tell you a story about the Archetype of Lilith:

Lilith's story is old, born in ancient myths.

She's often shown as wild, a symbol of dark sexuality. In many tales, she was Adam's first wife in Eden, a woman who wouldn't bow down and got cast out for it. She stands for a free, uncontrolled feminine spirit.

In deeper meanings, Lilithian forces push against what's usual and expected. Rebellion, sexual freedom, and breaking rules live in the dark corners of our minds.

These energies push us to explore our sexual selves and the freedom that comes with it.

But these forces do more than just tempt. They make us face the parts of us we often hide — our shadows. They're raw power, a mix of creation and destruction.

Dealing with them means seeing and understanding the desires and fears we keep buried. It's about bringing these hidden parts into our lives in a way that's balanced and healthy.

Sexual energy can be controlled by resisting temptations. Temptations test our balance and self-control.

They dare us to keep our integrity in the face of desires that could drain us or make us lose ourselves. Consciously working with these forces can be a path to real growth and understanding

Understanding what our inner Lilith archetype is about will bring us empowerement.

Exploring our raw sexuality; which means doing sexual practices consciously. So let’s to that!

A Balanced Approach to Masturbation

Nutting Up Your Spine: A Middle Ground

On my journey to achieve sexual balance, I discovered the concept of male orgasm. Instead of releasing sperm, I learned to keep it inside.

Keeping it in and using this intense built up of energy.

You can do this by exercising your PC-muscles.

“The pubococcygeus (PC) muscle is the muscle that stretches from your pubic bone to the bottom of your spine. Strengthening the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle can help both sexes treat urinary and fecal incontinence, as well as helping men avoid erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation.

PC muscle exercises are easy daily exercises that will help strengthen your PC muscle.”

You can read about how to strengthen this muscle in this Wikihow article: How to Do PC Muscle Exercises

If this muscle is strong enough, you can flex it while you are about to release.

You use this momentum of orgasm to shoot up that energy up your nervous system.

This is pure electrical charge, so called “chi” or life force energy, being transported up your spinal cord.

This will help you transform your mental state, providing you with mobilization of energy.

But this is only a solution temporarely. It is of utmost importance that you should have periods of release.

Shooting up your spine all the time will make you very positively charged, just like NoFap. But with this practice, you can at least give yourself pleasure.

But how do you know when to release?

I have two main guiding principles you can go by.

Two Guides as Practical Energy Management: the Moon and Sun Cycle

Moon Cycle:

As a man, Observing & pinpointing when in the span of a month you are more

sexually driven,

when are you more emotionally driven,

and when you operate on a mental framework predominantly,

is the practice here.

This gives you much insight into what kind of temperament you are working with at the moment. When energy is high, you can push yourself more on edge.

When energy is low, you feel more of your physicality and are more susseptive to pain. Care about yourself.

Beginning with the moon cycles as a guide, you can observe this waxing and waning in women. Their periods are synchronized with the moon cycle.

The Moon displays these eight phases one after the other as it moves through its cycle each month.

It takes about 27.3 days for the Moon to orbit Earth.

The Womens cycle is divided into 4 Phases:

Phase 1 — Menstrual Phase

Phase 2 — The Follicular Phase

Phase 3 — The Ovulatory Phase

Phase 4 — The Luteal Phase

We won’t go into what these phases mean, because this blogpost is about the male sexuality. Though you can read about the cycle of the female body here: The Menstrual Cycle

Now, we can articulate the rules for this guideline for males into 3 different phases.

It is important to note that none of this is a fixed ruleset. It is a general guideline for you to compare. Read it and question yourself how many days are you spending in which of these phases!

Phase 1 — The NoFap Phase:

This is where you abstain from from fapping and try to see life from a mental, above looking perspective. You will feel motivated, driven and horny.

You let your spirit dominate matter and remind yourself that the mental is supposed to rule over the material, carnal. Otherwise we would be animals. That is what makes us humans.

Phase 2 — The Transmutation Phase:

This phase is about the practice of nutting up your spine. As the days progress, you feel the intense build up from the NoFap Phase. You start giving yourself pleasure but abstaining from release.

When you are in this place, you will likely feel refreshed, alert, full of energy, and maybe even a little psychic. This is because you are taking care of your upper chakras. I recommend focusing on your heart center, as it is a point of balance. You can learn more about the heart center in my Loveletter "8 Steps to Fix Your Lack Of Courage."

Phase 3 — The Release Phase:

Here you let it all go. Release as much as you can, give your biology time to settle. Do not overindulge. But still let it all go as much as it feels healthy. This is the season where the fruits fall from the tree. Enjoy.

Now we come to the Solar Cycle:

This is about being practical.

Release at night, don’t release in the morning!

Reproducing reproductive fluids takes energy, nutrients and calories. You need them during the day.

If you ejaculate before starting the day, your body will focus on reproducing and use time and energy to create your reproductive fluids. This will make you operate on a lower mental capacity.

While releasing in the night before sleep will help you shut off your brain and your body gets into regeneration mode. You can automatically slow down and your body has enough time to rejuvenate. It is a great method to shut off your brain.

Be intentional and think practical with this approach.

There is a reason why most male athletes do not release before a competition.

So if you have intercourse or pleasure yourself in the morning, consider edging or nutting up your spine. This will leave you with the energy you need for the day.

Healthy Sexuality: The On Center Framework

It’s About Connection:

Last but not least, for the body of this Loveletter, I want to emphasize on Intercourse.

Sex is not “Sex” as an act. Sex is connection.

The quality of sex will always be determined and limited by the quality of connection you share with your partner. And so it is the same with masturbation. But with the relationship with yourself. The more self love you carry, the better and more fulfilling your masturbation practices will be.

“The On Center Framework” with the Sun Archetype:

In the Egyptian Tarot, the Sun stands as a powerful symbol for truth. It's also about happiness, the deep kind, rooted in truth across different levels.

Learning from it, I've seen how balancing our wants is key. It's not just about chasing every desire. That's a path to imbalance.

The Sun teaches moderation in desires. It's like fueling ourselves with solar energy – steady, enduring, and balanced. Going all out after every whim? That's the opposite. It's unhealthy, throwing us off balance. It's like being lost in a sea of wants, with no true center.

Picture this: a chart with you at the center and your desires all around the edge. If you chase every single one with equal hunger, you stay centered. You don't tip over to one side, obsessed with just one thing.

This 'On-Center Framework' is about spreading your desires evenly. It's a balancing act, keeping you grounded and focused. That way, you're not pulled too far in any one direction. You stay in control, not your desires.

Embracing Nature's Truth in Sexuality

Natures cycles – breathes in seasons. This rhythm is mirrored in us, in the ebb and flow of our energies, desires, and physical states. We understand that managing our sexual energy is not about strict abstinence or mindless indulgence.

It's about finding our rhythm, syncing with the natural cycles of the sun and moon, reflecting our biological tendencies.

The moon cycle can help us understand how our states change. These states include the drive of NoFap, the creative energy of transmutation, and the necessary release.

The sun cycle teaches us about practicality. It shows us the importance of timing.

This blog post is a call to remember that truth in sexuality is not fixed;

I hope you learned something for along your beautiful journey, brother. Let it flow with the rhythms of nature. Don’t get too caught up in rigid ideologies.

This is an invitation to explore and understand how we express and manage our sexual energy. Ultimately, it helps us find balance. The goal is not to restrict or indulge but to harmonize with the natural truths of our being.

Your Journey Towards Balanced Well-Being

Begin to observe your own life's rhythms. Pay attention to how the lunar and solar cycles influence your energy, your mood, your desires. Are you more driven during certain phases of the moon? This awareness is the first step towards aligning with nature's cycles.

I invite you to experiment with the concepts we've discussed.

Your story, your insights, they matter.

They add to our collective understanding as men and help other men on their path.

So, whether it's a breakthrough moment or a small step forward, share it. Let's learn from each other and grow together, brothers.

With love,

Tarkan